Random thoughts

I deserve to be expelled from bloggers list for the long sabbaticals I take with no particular reason. Thanks to blogspot and my readers who walk with me. I am here again J

I feel like writing but often feelings dont get reflected in writing well. Not many interesting episodes to key down in the last month. While I really want to write and have started to write, I have not much clue on what to write. So please do not expect much out of this post, unless I switch to some REALLY interesting topic without my intent.

It is 11:16 am precisely, a Wednesday pre-noon. 3 hrs past my entry to office. I see grey cloudy skies thro’ the tinted windows across my cube. Nice weather, not much work, what better can be a time to blog? Still be warned not to expect much out of me today :)

Ok - here I get. Let me talk to you about the happiness funda. Sometimes I get into this self-introspection mode, let me show u a bit of that "ME".

I often repeat these questions to my friends, specially the ladies, - How long(more) do you want to work? Are you such a techie that you work for the satisfaction that it gives? Are you one who doesn’t want to let go the knowledge you have earned investing your father's money and ur time on education? Make big money? Kill time? Well, not sure if I am really interested in knowing their replies, but I do want to see if I am normal like anyone else. So I do ask, for the questions I posted above are my reasons to continue working.

While the other reasons stand justified, "making money" sounds little off-the-shelf, though most % of working people do so to make money, a big one. And the reason that everyone does give is "a pursuit to happiness". Let me not argue for the million population, but speaking for myself, I have never been in a situation where I have felt the want for something. I do have good memory which my mother boasts often. She says I remember times from my childhood which she doesn’t. Well, that shouldn’t make you call me a tale-teller. If I trust my memory, from the age of 3, I have never been disappointed at any point in time with the lifestyle I have had. My father and mother, both worked in decent firms, but I have never heard them discuss their pay in front of us, as kids. Ignorant of what they earned, I always had a pampered life, just a thing line behind getting spoilt. We had our regular goodies, new clothes on every occasion worth mentionable, more-than-needed school/college accessories, cycle, bike and car as we grow with our parents. Whenever someone went out of town, it was a mandate that they get us something. We would not even look at their tired faces as they return back, but constantly gaze at their bags to see what was in store for us. Birthdays demanded 2 pairs of clothes, one for the birth "date" and other for the birth "star" which very rarely coincided. I don’t remember a time when my father and mother refused to give me money when I asked for. Infact they did so before I could go to them. They knew when I needed money to buy books, to treat friends, to go shopping for my personal stuff etc.

And today when I see, I earn fairly more than what my parents earned over years. And it gets better with every passing year. For the moment, it’s just the two of us at home, no major family responsibilities, no 3rd person to share money with, ofcourse we do have the household stuff to be taken care of. Maybe now I buy clothes without reason, buy new bags just because I find them good hanging in front of shop, buy fruits and vegetables and see them getting rotten by days and trash them finally, pay a huge sum for the maid servant, spend just as much on one salwar-suit as I would have spent for 5 earlier. It’s not just me, my parents' lifestyle, on the other hand has changed equally. It’s definitely way better than what it was years earlier. I am not trying to use my blog space to maintain my expense account; the point I am trying to analyze is - is there a better satisfaction quotient with bigger money, bigger and better things, stylish life? While big money allows us to experience the best that life has, it closes our senses to savor life's little pleasures. Money does matter upto a certain phase of life, where one has to worry about the basic luxuries(need is a term long forgotten). Once we have enough to waste on what we want, having more money wouldn’t make a big difference in life. We may afford a vacation in Malaysia, but that wouldn’t buy the happiness that a country side cottage can bring us in India.

SO, let me get back. Why do I work? I hope I am convinced not to say “ make money” J. Easy to say, lets see!!! I might still say I work to make money. But money defining happiness quotient is still debatable!!!

Being sensible to sensitivity!!!

I do not like to give "bhaav"(attention) to certain situations and/or people which I think do not really deserve. This may sound callous. Anybody who hears me saying this would think I am cold-blooded. But my point is, if you go on sympathizing a person for every small fall, you would contribute more to his weakness. Instead empathize and on empathizing, if you think there is a need for sympathy, then do "feel".

That was just a thought that came up during one of the tea-time conversations. And that wasn't what I came here for. I wanted to talk a little about being sensitive; not little, rather shout my mind out on it.
Some people have a dis proportionality in sensitive temperament. Let’s not deal with the case of HSP(Highly Sensitive People) disorder, that’s a physician's task. My question here is what amount of sensitivity is obligatory in normal life? To me, sensitivity is being quite receptive to every move happening around us. While being sensitive is regarded good, why do people not see it in right light? While in a conversation, to a sensitive person, even a brief pause creates an emotional overload. This small act may probe in 100 questions leaving the mind disturbed. The person starts his introspection of every word that he uttered, every pause that he gave in the conversation to analyze what would have made the other person take a break. And if the other isn’t sensitive and not sensible to sensitivity, he would have just got away from the conversation as he may have not had much to speak and no hard feelings there. As simple as that. The sensitive person would have strained his brain(should I say mind?) for no "real" reason! Such people are the thinkers, the cautious ones who think before and after they talk, who think about what they talk and what others do too.

It’s true that sensitive people pick-up on subtleties that non-sensitive people are not reflective to. While this turns out to be advantageous at situations it can be mess brewing too. Sensitive people tend to feel the energy of others, they have a preparedness to future events and have a solution to almost everything. Their emotions get the best out of them when they are with other sensitive lot. But in a crew of non-sensitive people they feel misplaced. Besides all their traits they also have an expectation from others to be sensitive towards them, not be very impulsive, take a minute, empathize and act.

It isn’t so easy to "fix" either natures. As the word goes, it’s the innate nature of a person to be either sensitive or not. A little maturity and detachment is what it needs for a sensitive person to avoid sweating on small stuffs, be more discipline with emotions and more rational. The non-sensitive lot have to know, sometimes emotions get responded better than logic. Acknowledge emotions. At times, do read the unwritten, hear the unspoken, feel the unshown; Avoid blaming a sensitive person for his/her mood, give him/her time to deal with, back with your affectionate shoulder if you can. That’s all it takes! It isn’t fake or superficial, it’s just a way of showing what you feel and feeling what you show.

I understand being sensitive is not same as being emotional, but they are woven intimately. Being sensitive or sensible does not help. Being “sensible to sensitivity” is the mantra!

Having spoken so much, I am a misfit to either natures. I am one who doesn’t give superfluous attention to things that do not qualify to be attended to and at the same time highly sensitive :P

aah .. ok... just let go!

How many times have you faced the un-noticed, ignored, invisible "YOU" behind actions that to your part may seem reasons to be acknowledged?  How many of these times have you just shrugged with a "let go" thing instead of making the other person know your want for acknowledgement?

My recent posts are trending more towards behavioral pattern. No! I am not doing any management program. My blog just happens to be in that phase now!

Well, to be on point, is it wrong to expect acknowledgement? Personally I don’t think it’s any wrong and I for one do expect it in lot – enough feedback, compliment and goody goody words make me feel good. I don’t see those words as formality factors. "Hey good job", "well done", "Nice, I liked it" blah blah.. are motivational verbs to me and its just a way to get to know what the other person felt about my action. It may seem “ceremonial”  to some people, but ask me – I would say I do care for the other person and sincerely would like to know if he/she liked what I did.

On the flipside, only when acknowledged verbally is a “done thing” felt or received well? - There could be a contrary argument of this kind. “Well, I felt good and satisfied, but after all its you, you aren’t an outsider, I don’t have to thank you or say ‘well done’ for what you did”! - could be the other person’s call!

Does it mean you(I) are much evolved than the rest?

No! You are not being natural, it’s all fake – could be the counter!

Sometimes the counter isn’t wrong either. There are cases when we, to our conscious will know that something could have been done better,  but hear ourselves saying…”Its fine. Decent job” – thats just not to disappoint the other person. Ofcourse we may take time and effort to explain things to him/her later, but there is  this ready - courtesy face all the time! A need to be a good-person to everyone every time!

More questions than opinions or statements! but that’s natural when we deal with any topic that revolves around human behavior –  always as complex as it can get!!!

I guess acknowledging someone for their action is more an emotional need and that’s how our brain handles the emotions. Whether we truly feel the need to acknowledge the other person or not, a bit of it can do good..be it fake too! A lie isn’t a lie if it can perk up a person’s mood and better things.

Also there is no wrong in seeking acknowledgement from people whom you think are imperative. If they aren’t the kind, they will soon become one. “Don’t wait for someone. Show how and you will get it soon!”.

A gentle tap for a job well-done, a “thank you” to a simple act-through can make a huge difference in life!

I meant this and you understood that????

If everyone always agreed on what to call things, then my word would be same as your word, and what my content intended would be mutually understood. Well, while trying to talk about vocabulary problem I guess I have drafted my very first statement with complicated vocabulary. To keep things simple, let me tell you this! When someone asks you - "How are you doing"?, If you reply with, "I am ok", the other person can mean you are just OK and there is something that isn’t keeping you all happy. But on your part ok could mean "Oll Korrect" - everything is in place and that means you are doing good.

The impulsive choice of words to speak the same content differs with people, and the probability of two people using the same word is little. The problem could be one of these - use of same word with multiple meanings, use of different words with same meaning, or variation with your normal usage, well the last case is if the person knows you closely enough to know when you say “OK” - it means you are stiff; “okay” – only official, no personal favours please; When it’s an  “ok” - there’s no meaning beyond just ok, “k” - you are indeed busy and when you type an “Okie” - your mood is really light(ofcourse this is just my experience with my close chat-associates).

"I meant this and you understood this". - Do we not end up spending extra hours on small things which could have otherwise been avoided? By the time the two people in conversation come to a degree of consensus, friction, argument and many more would have had their unhesitant journey inbetween. But how to avoid this vocabulary problem? How to mean or convey something in a way the other person understands or atleast doesn’t misunderstand.

In most cases the problem lies with us than with the other person involved in the conversation. Sometimes our words deceive our action. When we say "ok", "fine", "go ahead" - we actually mean the opposite of it. Let’s put our thoughts in words - as frank as we want them to mean and not give space for assumption. Empathy is probably an alternative solution. We should assume that the other person doesn’t have one and that we have it in lots and give freely. When we say something to the other person, let’s be at the receiving end and perceive, if in the context our usage of the word makes right sense? Another thing that spots on is, with too many things on hand and mind, we tend to be discrete..and answer in points. We often forget we are humans and we have adequate senses. Why don’t we just say, "hey thanks. I am doing ok, how are you " - this would avoid people from interpreting us differently for we would’ve spoken out every word and leave nothing to assume instead of just “I am ok”.

It’s also possible that a person’s meaning or interpretation of a word depends on the region and environment he is from. While that’s one part of it, even among two close people within a family, simple statements can get misunderstood. That’s because everyone who involves in a conversation is a person and not a machine. Each will have his own belief, opinion, experience on every word that he utters. It’s the context he is familiar with and the word-usage that he is used to, he uses with/on you. So, when we see the person behind the word we will avoid most of the mis-interpretation.

This isn’t an exception with official communication. When its personal and/or emotional, an after word could  atleast solve issues springing from mis-communication. Think about those words that can make or break a deal in business. There’s no chance for a second explanation. Many a times the clients would be from a different geographical zone and although we may share the same official language, there could be a regional tinge which could make same words mean different to the two parties. Here is where a need to understand  the person’s meaning of a word and use the same/similar one while communicating with him to avoid mystification.

Well, if we don’t interpret, much of the problem gets solved; but interpretation is the basis of communication.

You need to interpret what’s on your mind and put it across. And I need to interpret your words as I listen and take action. But let my action not be to point fingers at you.

Lo! Vocabulary problem doesn’t have a solution. Hope it fades with our efforts:)

No time, no patience and no time for patience!

This morning I saw a little boy with his father on his way to school. The most simple word that can be used to describe the scene would still look complicated in front of the simple, unassuming sight that I saw. The father was taking his boy on a 2-wheeler, I cannot name the vehicle. It seemed smaller than a luna, resembled a bicycle but was motor driven. In the middle of the road the vehicle had a break-down. Neither the father nor the little boy showed any sigh of frustration. Instead he got down and started pushing his motor-driven-cycle with the boy still sitting on it. The boy seemed to enjoy this more than when the father ran(rode) the vehicle. The smile on the boy's face sought a smile from the father. They reflected a low-economy lot, but the smiles on their faces were worth a million.

Well, I am not mincing words to articulate what I saw. This exactly is the description of what my retina captured. How many working fathers today have time and patience with their kids like the one I did see?

With money, sophistication, hyped life styles where do we take life simple? We see many parents growing wild waiting for their kids' school bus if it doesn’t come on time. Don’t we lose patience while waiting for our office cab? We have no patience at work, no patience back at home, no time for self, absolutely no time for others.

Over the space of a decade, and across many work-styles and workplaces, no matter how many time-saving tools have come up, people just keep getting busier.  No time for even things we like doing. You wish to pick a gift for your best friend; though you like shopping and you would love to hand-pick the special gift for your special friend, you end up shopping online. After a long day at work, people have no time for self and no patience for family. Even a little boy waiting for his parents to be back from office gets the same treatment. No interest to cook the food we like and savour it; no mind on the things that once were very close to our hearts; no care towards our own health; no time to spare; no time, no patience and no time for patience! Where is this generation heading????

Adding to the post....

“One morning”

I wish, one morning, the chirping birds wake me

"It’s always me" - yells the alarm bee

I wish, the silvery sun peeps thro the silent window, wish me a happy morning

The screeching cabs across the road sound their horn never fading

I wish, one morning, I wake up to a no-agenda day

The mobile phone beeps a long "TO DO" list in sleep as I still lay

I wish, one morning, the coffee aroma pokes my nostrils while I am still asleep

Lo! The dry coffee machine lies asleep till I fill it with water deep

I wish, one day, just one morning I lead a life unhurried

Tension, anxiety, work, commotion - all masked!!!

Will I get my “one morning”?

Every “you” will wish for an unhurried life away from today’s race. Isn’t it? Am sure you will be able to relate to it!

Carnatic music - Is it only for a few ? - A random thought

People claim that Carnatic music is more popular among the aged population than the trendy ones. They shore up their tirade by quoting that Carnatic music is mostly based on divinity and religion and that says it all. This puts up a question - Can an atheist enjoy Carnatic music? Is Carnatic music meant only for a creamy class of people? Is it meant for the matured and the aged minds alone?

The forefathers of Carnatic music undoubtedly took to the path of Music to realize God. While God realization was the ultimate goal, they enjoyed the trail as much as the destination. Music (singing as an exercise) encompasses Holistic breathing and chakra stabilization - Healthy mind, healthy body and Healthy body, healthy mind. This lit their journey driven by a body, pink in health and a white peaceful mind. Religion and divinity were then the two topics aspected to a good living. Any new venture was then to either embrace or oppose these. The musical ancestors combined the elements of Bhakthi and Music passionately. The initial endeavors paid off well. More people were attracted towards this artistic form. This heralded a new era to the preachers of other dimensions like philosophy, jingoism etc. Capturing the underlying rule, the raga and the bhava, on the whole the medium – MUSIC imprisoned the crowd-following and not the orientation, be it spiritual, patriotic or religion. Music then was taken as a podium to unite people for a single cause. Carnatic music can hence be said to have originated from the spiritual and religious milieu. But it dint stagnate there, it gradually crossed the boundaries.

It’s the strengths that makes Carnatic music, Music oriented and not situation bound.
Simple and expressive, intricate and challenging: The range of melodic and rhythmic ideas that Carnatic music offers can be employed in a simple, appealing way or in a subtle structure as well. Saint Thyagaraja’s early compositions, Divya nama sankeerthanams make easier meal compared to Dikshithar’s Navagraha, Navavarana krithis. While that serves the religious and theist populace, lighter compositions like the javalis, challenging nadais in thillanas and Pallavi(RTP) have the ability to hold tight the younger generation.

Carnatic music thus offers a wide scope to quench the desire for expansion, be it in the lyrical, melodic or the rhythmic direction. Ragas and swaras are bound to no God, no religion. They just belong to the language of music, the religion of music. A phrase with no words absolutely can be remarkably intellectual compared to a composition laden with words.

Why is it then people still associate Music to God and divinity? In my idea, the depth of expression and directness that Carnatic music offers can probably be not compared to anything mortal or easily known. Carnatic music dwells in the soul, lights the inward journey and hands an easy path to converse with the mind.

Bhakthi, divinity, devotion, theism are topics not comfortable for many these days owing to the growing diverse tastes, beliefs and rationales of people. The contemporary ideas could probably make the younger crowd stay away from core Carnatic music and embrace new-fangled music. Let the ideas of philosophy and religion not dilute the traditional art forms. Human life wouldn’t be complete if the aesthetic angle is ignored and the young minds have to be exposed to such beautiful artistic forms early in life. Spirituality and religion can be late comers but not art.

A fitting conclusion to this post would be to recollect Sri TM Krishna's words from one of his Marghazhi utsavam's concert. He said Music is divine, and anything that’s being sung is divine and slopes on Bhakthi, with Bhakthi meaning deep focus on a theme, not necessarily God. And if he sings a composition on love or even just about a stone, its all in the name of BHAKTHI.

PS: Do not mind my bias to this art form. Intention is not to neglect the rest.

This isnt my kind of post. I would generally not prefer showing my frustration on paper and let readers carry. But if this blog post could help me get away with my disturbance and share my feelings/thoughts with people who land on my blog, I can’t be more happy.

My ears tuned to the news of a college kid's suicide this morning, a boy who had grown up in front of my eyes. Such incidents have become so familiar these days that many of us have lost our senses and emotions to news of this kind. Finding it difficult to gulp the news and the several odd reasons I could trace behind it, I decided to scribe it down here.

There is this boy who has the reputation that goes behind any good student. Circumstances or fate prevails over letting the boy not score as much as he had marked for himself. Is this a reason to end life? Tell me, is this why we educate kids? Even when he fell short of his expectations, he wasn’t the kind to be termed “not up to snuff” . All that his home now houses is his traumatized parents lamenting to figure out the boy’s depression behind this sudden decision.

A kid who cannot face his marks/friends/parents/society gets guts to face death? Call it immaturity or mellowness? Are the movies and media to be blamed, which portray suicide as an easy solution to many problems and death being embraced as an easy friend. My hand trembles when I type the very word suicide, how can a little boy cuddle it?

We all agree that kids of these days are more intelligent, more rationale and have all that is good for the several neurons officing in the brain. Aren’t we seeing these most intelligent brains searching for rapid escape from life backing on some trivial competition factor?

If I sit back and think,

1- It is the feeling of worthlessness that leads to depression and depression to such scary end. Teach the child to seek help when he is not feeling good emotionally. Diminishing into depression could have various reasons, but the child isn’t to be blamed. It is the mental frame at that particular hour and the child must be given hope that he isn’t at slip and that things would get better.
2- Teach kids the art of socializing for it is more likely that a child opens up and shares its apprehensions when he moves with people.
3- Schools that implant the concept of competition should infuse in kids a mind to accept failure too.
4- Parents should give time to the little brains to digest knowledge. Not all brains are manufactured in the same machine.
5- Satisfying the society shouldn’t be the thing topping the list, one should know to LIVE for SELF with his knowledge/capabilities and talent and not get hassled.
6- Schools must impart philosophical training on the significance of life.
7- Parents must teach kids to love life and not adore competition.
8- Be a friend to your kid when you think he needs one and when he is low. Be around with him. Take him out, shower more love.
9- Give spiritual education. Spirituality is not about running around temples and seeking God. It is about knowing life, its value and to live one.

It doesn’t make me feel good to bullet down points when a family is under such suffering and dismay. I started keying in only because I, a stranger couldn’t admit the fright. All I wish to share with the readers who hit this post is "Death is not a way to escape from the confusion of life. Everyone has a right to life, but not to end it. Taking life away could give one relief, but he will remain a hitch to each one of his people for their entirety. Running away is never an escape. It’s a bigger trap. Let the end product of academic competition not be adolescent suicide"

Discussions on this should lead to light and not churn up heat. Hope this post lets me and the readers extract some virtue however trivial it is.

Dependency

“Hey did u file the IT returns of your daughter” asked my father’s friend. His son is on a long term onsite and the father is left behind to fill the application, collect Form 16, forge the signature and all that’s expected from the candidate. After this call ended, a sequel started and picked up, hooked on to an argument at home between my father and his brother.
Why should the kids be dependent on parents even at their age of financial independence? Was my Uncle’s argument and my father took a different stand saying, a kid remains a kid as long as either of them stay alive.

The argument left me pondering. As a kid, all of us grow up with instructions from parents - brush your teeth, pick your bag, tie your lace, this course suits you, go for it; buy the gladiator bike, though it isn’t with the trend, it gives you more mileage – yes all of us would have got showers of these and oodles more. Do we call this enslavement or codependency to keep an order in relationship?

A child is forced to comply by the decisions and instructions of its parents. Our parents literally carry us to the kindergarten. While in the middle school, they take us by hand, in high school and pre-college, they decide the academic course suitable for us. At every stage, there is a reliance of the kids on parents. These subtle responsibilities and order-obedience mode is necessary to bind the two in this relationship. But this gradually fades away as we grow up into an adult and pose self-reliant.

As grown-ups too we can be dependent on parents on many matters - What it wrong? Personally, my father handles my finance and tax details. It isn’t a big burden nor am I lazy to do it myself. I enjoy this dependency, so does my father. There are various other ways for us kids to return back our parents’ due. How much ever we do, we will be indebted to them for our entire life!!

While breaking free the chains of dependency is a good thing, maintaining a delicate dependency on parents, even as a grown-up is an essential aspect to fasten this child-parent bond.

"Dad, why don’t you help me verify the BDA site’s documents" – do you think you are taxing him? Absolutely Not – he will be happy that you are using his experience and maturity in handling things.
"Dad, I’ll get a printout of both our IT forms, lets sit and fill them together."
"Mom, please select me a saree for my friend’s marriage"

Man! I tell you, they never consider this a saddle. Instead they will be happy that even as a grown-up you value them. This is exactly what is needed in this relationship.

Quoting the well acknowledged,
"If you look deeply into the palm of your hand, you will see your parents and all generations of your ancestors. All of them are alive in this moment. Each is present in your body. You are the continuation of each of these people."

- There is dependency whether we like and acknowledge or not! Why shy away from exhibiting :)

No Name

I wish I could go back in time when the biggest change round the corner was getting up at 5:30 am to keep on time to the bus. Life has pampered me more than it should have. I am a creature who finds comfort in the enduring phases of life though they might not be as fascinating to the rest. I don’t believe in skating all thro’ the year; I love to pause-by and enjoy every split second of this beautiful life. Simple pleasures like playing with a balloon, sipping a cup of tea sitting on the stairs outdoor, watching the color of a growing leaf turn deeper by days, a board of carom with grandpa, lazy evening walk with mamma, a cuddled sleep with my teddy and heaps more fill my kitty than a giant certificate.

This time around - deep within, there is a resistance for change, tats been the case with me always though - "fear of unknown" or "fear of stepping out of the comfort zone". I do not know! But then thats life all about...Changes come every few years. While some go unnoticed letting us adapt seamlessly, some need towers, tall enough for a seamless transition. After all mind is a petty one and I fully comprehend if it can’t figure the cargo.

The post would be incomplete if I don’t script this one from Jiddu K... He has bemused me many a times, all the same, has lit the path to inward journey... (Not sure which station I am in now:))...Each line of his gets me thinking. I seem to stop reading and start thinking –meaning I ideally haven’t taken off on my expedition yet :)

Here it goes:
"It seems to me that the real problem is the mind itself and not the problem which the mind has created and tries to solve. If the mind is petty, small, narrow, limited, however great and complex the problem may be, the mind approaches that problem in terms of its own pettiness...Though it has extraordinary capacities and is capable of invention, of subtle, cunning thought, the mind is still petty. It may be able to quote Marx, or the Gita, or some other religious book, but it is still a small mind, and a small mind confronted with a complex problem can only translate that problem in terms of itself, and therefore the problem, the misery increases. So the question is: Can the mind that is small, petty, be transformed into something which is not bound by its own limitations?"

Having said that, I know life s beautiful and am sure its gonna get better with time :)

For the sake of blogging

The cold obverse has moved in making the days pleasant for the last week or so, unusual for this time of the year in Bangalore. Bangalore is very predictable on this front. Depression anywhere, even just on the newspaper – Bangalore is ready to embrace it...Probably that’s why people are happy breathing in here.

With my friends being kept at distance (no, don’t get me wrong, not intentionally!) my days have been just gulping along. Am not a very social kind, I respond to people and most times never initiate. Have been fortunate to have a couple (couple in every sense ;) ) of good friends who have untiringly pulled me out of my knot. They r just a call/ chat/ mail away but the distance is most felt when I need company to eat. I’ve never stopped commenting at people who come alone to the cafeteria, sit, eat and go. We have special names too “loser” “loner” – have shed all efforts to get the right lingo. Strange but true it’s a loner writing here.There were days when I have even skipped a meal or two just for the reason that I had to munch alone. Days have got me matured. Weird! I find myself enjoying my own company, sometimes the one on the other side of the call. As some explicitly tell apart, it is “solitude” not “loneliness”.

To quote the cliched,

The best way to prepare for life is to begin to live.

I seem to be taking pleasure in what once seemed boring, lacking luster!

A random compilation

Both the recent visits to Tirupathi were with a fine grade of contentment. There s something numinous, out-of-world at Tirupathi. Each time I stand in the queue, I’ll see myself filled with all awe and anxiety as if it is the first ever visit to His abode. Balaji really has that mystical clout. No wonder we see people from every part, not just from India flocking up there. While the Dec visit was stimulated by the Dasa sahitya kutcheri and sangeetha seva at the Unjal utsavam, Feb visit was enthused by a frnd who wanted to ascend the hill on foot. After almost 4-long hrs of strenuous up-walking, the congregating crowd at the hill top was the sight most pleasing. The strain, sprain, twist was all forgotten with the most beautiful darshan and as always by the time I came out I had tears rolling down. I am not quite sure if its the cultural context setting or my delicate attachment with Tirupathi Hero.

The drive to/from Blore was enjoyable. For once my friends and family accepted me as a driver, maybe still a half-driver :).Both the trips were exciting in their own way.

Back at work, this year's project s begun in full span and is keeping me to ma seat till say 6 sparing not much time for gossip and long breaks. However this doesn’t stop us from bitching about the new policies in cafeteria and free food. Catch hold of any person working out here with me – He’ll have loads and loads to engage u with.......only provided u sign-in b4 time...be on time, u get free bf(breakfast not boyfriend), free lunch, and free gossips too! :)

It’s been a time for girl babies everywhere now. Every other day, I see a mail -"Sweets at desk. Blessed with a girl baby". Good going little angels. Time for girls now!!! Time to party :).

Am enjoying my part as an evaluator at NADA's DLP(Distance Learning Programme).Its educative and compelling to read (leave aside evaluating) the views of people from different parts of the world on music. Music has been proving itself a Universal language again and again and a not-yet resolved mystery when it comes to its healing facade. While demanding scientific fallouts to explain the therapeutic facades of music I am afraid our people are greatly ignoring its curative results, seen thro experience and practice, waiting for science to mature.

It’s been quite sometime since I blogged events back to back. This blog is one such rare compilation :-) .Thanks for the patient reading.Hope to be back soon…Until then bye!

Sleep more !

How strange it is…that the body has to have its entire work function shut down for so many hours every day...said a friend in a casual chat. If only 70% of the human life is active life, then there is a long way to go for us to evolve and increase the activity time...he added.

Yes, time is now undoubtedly the most precious commodity in the age of achievement racing with speed. We claim that our generation is more effective than our previous in every respect. Be it in terms of learning, being creative, achieving more - we are said to be racing ahead of time. At what cost? Depriving sleep? How? I am totally lost in understanding the concept of why people sleep.

Scientific, medicinal and neuro research have confirmed that sleep is necessary to give brain a chance and time to rebuild memories stored all day long and associate these with previously learnt things, form a linked list and keep it ready for traversal. Sleep enhances learning and that is why babies sleep so much (they learn all day; everything they see, they do is a new learning to them).

It’s often heard that the day prior to any important event shouldn’t be sleep-deprived, for, it would influence adversely. Not having sufficient sleep prior to any form of learning would be costly in terms of losing focus, less concentration, not remembering an otherwise well-remembered and liked subject. Deprived Sleep after learning will hamper the consolidation of memories; you know the linked list we just spoke wouldn’t be well linked.

So saying , this gen people are said to think more, learn more, play more, create and recreate more, so must SLEEP more!

Wanna be disciplined even in sleeping? Visit http://www.supermemo.com/articles/sleep.htm

From a life of simplicity to……….

Where are the days when all I wrote was about Unnikrishnan, collected paper cuttings of Sonu Nigam, a wide-eyed wait for his Zee Sa-Re-Ga-Ma show? No complications, a simple life, small pleasures and it all worked fine then.
Now I have an ample of topics to write on, go on talking about, pictures to post, records to share, and dreams to follow; yet I end up searching for a topic to blog. I get paranoid to write. Do I write about the day of myriad emotions, the day I won many hearts, hurt a few, the terrific images of past peeping in now and then, the boring monotonic present over my shoulder all day, achievements that give me a spirit to walk upright, an all busy-day with no time for coffee, a lazy day looking for topics to blog? I think of it! Not so long ago, I was all pleased spending time with my greeting Cards collection and my Unnikrishnan cassettes.

Time changes everything. Once we looked so young, our gardens were just set, the shoes sized only 4, tests and exams were the only responsibilities we knew!
Did we take any steps to prepare ourselves for the transition with time? Naah!

To quote the hackneyed
Life varies its stories. Time changes everything, yet what is truly valuable-what is worth keeping-is beyond time.

I hope you have treasured you treasure with changing times :)

Welcome the year with a prayer

Have I lost interest in festivals and celebrations or have they lost interest in me? Festivities of these days have become just days of sweets and mittais. A year has passed by and nothing looks fresh, different, and new. The urge of waiting for it to strike 12,calling up frnds/relatives with a feel-good factor of being the first to wish them on the New Year has all faded up.

Twenty Ten or 2010 or call it with the UN christened name - “International Year of Youth” and “International Year of Biodiversity”. What do we expect out of it?Definitely a year better than the previous, in every respect!
Many main events dominated the year 2009, some good, some bad and many ugly.
The year would be probably remembered best for the death of so many celebrities right from Michael Jackson to DKP, some preceding,many succeeding and some in-between the two. The ugly demon did not spare even the retiring month taking away Vishnuvardhan, Ashwath.
The economic downturn and the financial crisis painted a major canvas of the year.
Probably the year wasn’t as bad to the movie-makers and the actors. There were a couple of movies rated good and lauded.

Jo hua, so hua…Moving ahead, let us welcome the Year 2010 with a hope and prayer for things to silhouette better and in favor of everyone.
May this year of TIGER (as the Chinese call it) fill the homes with exotic treasures and hearts with contentment. May this year give -
More time for friends, More love to family, More soul to live everyday with zest and more strength to live the year thro’!

How would you reflect being called a Feminist?

Well, I wouldn’t mind as long as my views are heard and I am content with placing my point across.
There was this usual irksome statement that I heard yest which pushed me to blog this. "Hey dont cry like a gurl!" WTH does that mean? How do I even counter, there is even a movie carrying this "Boys dont cry" which features a gurl getting converted 'coz she wants to be treated a "boy".

"Look there, this lady in the car has blocked the traffic". "Comeon gurl, give way, do not walk on the road". "No wonder shes in for this post, she used her charms and not her brain."- Why do the index fingers easily point to a gurl at every case, in every site?

If we put on weight, it is coz we are lazy to work out. If the guys do, the blame shift is on the fast food place down the street and their heavily loaded job schedule which doesn’t let them take time off to gym.

And why juggle with numbers, giving 33% ,40% seats/reservations. Btw, what rights do the givers have? We are no minority to take permission from them, to get a concession from them. A lady being a home-maker can well balance work at an outside firm; Girls outdo boys in many competitive examinations, at variety sports, workplace, arts etc.
This being the case y still discriminate?
A tall gurl is often blamed by her parents for not being able to match a guy's height during marriage-hunt. If the guy is tall, the term used is "Handsome".
If a gurl concentrates on her career, she is termed "work-o-holic" ;if its a guy- “he is smart and career oriented”. A gurl wishes to go to the distant states for further studies- people would declare she s escaping marriage with creative stories unfolding. If a guy wishes to continue his studies, people call him studious, intelligent and goal-oriented.

People speak of feminists’ acts, discrimination laws with pride, but nothing seems to change this fractured society.
It would do lot good not to hear statements like “You can’t do it, you are a gurl”! “Why don’t you give time to the family, let him concentrate on his career”! “It is better you relocate, he can’t think of changing his job now”!
Keeping away from these sweeping declarations would help gurls get out of the chilly home climate and think of a warm world outside. Reservation for women is just a distasteful remedy; the need of the hour is to remove the discrimination from the minds than from the roots.

Just Like that

Sorry about the recent inactivity in my posts. Have been trying to work on a deeper subject which may be little uninteresting for a customary blog. Shall drop a link when it reaches a logical completion.

I am here with no specific topic in mind...Just brooding over how quickly time has passed by."Deepavali celebration,Rangoli competetion, floor decoration – Come on guys hurry up –cheer up to celebrate the festival" - The usual mail from HR at office got me to think we are already close to the year end. The memories of wishing the dear and near ones for last year Deepavali and New Year are still fresh...Infact I have my LAST YEAR'S action items list to wish a few people unticked yet.

It feels as if the months are just flying by me. Understandable if one is so busy that they have so much to accomplish, but not as much time....I wouldn’t say I have no plans on my cards, have enough aspirations, but not to an extent that I go buying for time from everyone I meet . . . The year has been eventful on personal front…”eventful” is the word, I don’t really mean good or favorable.….Not sure! When I sit back to think what has been done this year...I can only say I have successfully spent the days...doing what? I dunno !!!My "Wanting-TO-DO" list is never ending and my "TO-DO" list never begins.

Work, music, fun, friends, recreation, hog properly and then diet for a week, feel good about people complimenting you that you have put-off, blogging on Wednesdays, slogging on Thursdays-as a friend rightly termed - frames MY life. But it isn’t just that. I wouldn’t want to get philosophical and say "I have come here on purpose and to know who I am and what I am destined to do as a spiritual being"...Nor would I want to shrug it aside saying "I don’t have a purpose in life, God has forgotten to give me one"!!!.
Well, a life I expect of mine is to enjoy and appreciate what I like doing and share the same with a greater crowd. A little service to the needy, a soothing ear to the let-down , a comforting shoulder to the depressed soul, service and attention to the needy elderly....Even if we start this with our family and friends, life would be more satisfying than a life revolving around gadgets we invent and buying a life with the money we mint! Just wishing that the days ahead would give me more purposeful life than that’s gone by. Signing off with a hope that my next year post would run through pages with the things on my Wish-List accomplished :)

"The butterfly counts not months but moments,
and has time enough." ~R.Tagore

Taking life as it comes

This post is a sequel enduring with my present state of mind. The topic of ‘how people take/accept life’ has always left me bamboozled. A close relative dropped in this evening and his approach to life puzzled me beyond question .He was sharing that he deals with life as it comes within the framework of his knowledge, capabilities and spirit. While on one end, I was surprised by his practical, rational, self-accepting spirit towards life, my mind started wandering around the other kind of people, the most “frequent” kind; People who are never pleased with anything good that life brings and always look ahead for more and more. Soon we are born, we start dreaming, our people start dreaming for us. Its a struggle where everyday we manage to live to tell the tale to others. And the next day, we would but be a step closer towards our grave. There is an element of competition; of aspiration inherent in every venture we undertake whether it is music, education, profession, business, marriage. We always seek to outsmart the people around us. We envision life to be of certain “brand” and when we fall short of our expectations and the expectations that people situate for us , a stance of negativism begins to creep in and life becomes painful and difficult to deal with.

Not to discourage the readers who have high levels of sanguinity and expectations from life. Dealing with life the way it comes doesn’t depict a life without goals. It just means that we remain more practical and less cutthroat when it comes to comparison with a peer. There should remain a spirit of competition, an element of struggle, but the yardstick being our own capabilities a day prior and the struggle to outdo our yesterday’s abilities and be a better “we” tomorrow. If I can code an assembly which is atleast 5% more optimized than my yesterday’s work, I am a better “me” today. If I can riaz for fifteen mins more than yest, I can consider myself a better singer than what I was yesterday. Easily said than done! Once we start accepting life without staying in a stuck state of mind and not judging everything that comes in way, we would be stepping in the right and easy trail. Everything needn’t be judged or interfered.The earlier we comprehend that life is a package of surprises both positives and negatives, we would know that it does not matter how well we plan or live our life, we will find our-self learning thru it everyday.

The game of fame

Is this the price we pay for having born as humans? Even a crow sighs “How I wish I was a cuckoo and people sing my praises” – narrates the legend. When animals with limited senses can chase desire, how can humans be spared of hounding behind wants? The echoing retort of anybody today would be to become famous. The TV shows, Big Brother, Rakhi’s Swayamwar all orbit around fame, celebrity. Do we need to be famous to be ourselves? Do we need to glimpse through others’ eyes to see what we are and keep ours half-shut? Do we have to discover ourselves from what is being written in black and white on newspapers? Should we fancy our persona from our pictures on the cover pages of top magazines? Should we value our worth with the number of hits on Google? In today’s life, monetary dreams have become far bleaker compared to a future envisioned with fame. Should we realize our capacity through mere publicity?

Knowledge is to be shared. Talent is to be shown. A musician’s music is to reach a greater audience; an artist’s work is to be displayed in a crowd; a philosopher’s words are to be captured in pages; But, but all these with an intent of educating, benefiting, enlightening more people than be satisfied with the self. With this superior intent comes the flattering offer “fame”. It isn’t easy to turn it away. Fame is good; it paves way to connect to more people; network with a BIGGER group, share and exchange ideas; helps break boundaries. Here ends its kindness. Fame concretes a wall around us, limits our dealings to a class of people-a class that our mind recognizes and fancies. Gives glamour and takes away health; Makes us contemplate additional on it(fame) than the trait-flair that showered us the fame. More hype and less hope; Makes us speculate more on stranger’s comments and heed less our well-wisher’s expressions; Our senses are drilled by the critic’s opinions. We are gifted a life- a life that we accept and embrace – a life that appears ornate, vivid on reviews, TV – but what really goes behind the smiling, “happy” faces ? A complete, agreeable, contented life? Not quite true!

As everything does, fame too is entitled with these two evenly arresting faces of the coin.
The good and “not so good” .While the former gives the artist an arena to strap up his talent, the latter conceals him in a shell of gluttony. In actuality, the worthy and genuine talents would know what to cuddle to.
A life furnished with all that is needed for fulfillment of a day buys more happiness than desperately clinging onto fame.
It does so much good to live distinctive than leading a life of fame.

Lay your sleeping head!!!

If we dig deep the origin of diverse genres of music, we will observe that each of it stalked out from a certain situation. Game music which is the talk of the day is based on this situational music. From the times of Super Mario to the now trend Counterstrike –all use music in interactive settings. Music played in the health spas, poojas, marriages have specific variants to suit the situation and ambience. Daniel J Levitin, the musicologist and author of “This is your brain on Music” quotes that the foremost origin of music dates back to Darwin himself who believed that Music had been the situational mode of communiqué in all human and paleohuman mating rituals.
Situational music makes use of the context of space or event to define characteristics of music and how people relate to it. Some musical works are created to allow contemplation and long periods of sustained listening. A classic exemplar to this simple criterion of situational music is Lullaby. It was originally designed as a composition intended to respite a child. A typical mind’s eye portrayal of the nativity of lullaby genre would be a person holding and swaying a baby, cajoling it in a sweet gentle tone; more of a monotone and mechanical than attention gathering.

Be it the telugu laali paatalu, tamizh thaalatu, kannada jojo haadu, hindi loriyan, the English versions of “Brahms’ Lullaby” all dole out the same rationale.
Ever wondered why lullabies quiet infants to sleep? Their constitution holds the key.
These musical pieces are constructed repetitive in nature. Since they form recurring rhyming patters, the brain will not have to exert much to recognize the sound and assimilate the pattern. The brain tunes to the lullaby track. The brain is convinced on its part that it is aware of what is being played at the milieu and this could probably induce nap since the brain is at rest. It is best proven by playing a song repeatedly, neednt be essentially of lullaby-nature to a child (preferably at bed time). The familiarity to the song affirms the above said logic and puts the baby to sleep.
“lu lu” “la la” “laa li” “jo jo” form the rich text of the lullaby vocabulary, the two syllable sounds which infacts can easily relate to. The use of this kind of music is so demanding that almost every mother across the prefectures would have composed/ learnt at least one lullaby for her child. The intention behind lullabies to lull child to slumber demands soothing gentle ragas, softly paced and are usual sung with many melismas.
Indian lullabies in ragas like Nelambari ,senchuruti have been scientifically proven to have received conditioned response .The swaras in these ragas are structured beautifully with melismatic techniques to induce a hypnotic trance in the listener. So the above said concept of repetitive nature alone doesn’t suffice, but a soothing tune/tone in lullaby is preferred to promote sleep over hard rock and tough beats.
Lullaby has many other benefits to offer too .At the age of infancy the innocent minds cannot capture and appreciate the libretto of the lullaby. But as familiarity breeds, the little minds would seek to get deep into the niceties of the music they are acquainted with. This is where lullaby works as a civilizing interface between the veteran parents and the naive children. One can instill their cultural values, narrate the child traditional stories through lullabies. Also through this simple music genre, sound recognition in children develops well.

At the end of the day, the question still remains unanswered .Though we have happily coined out the term “situational music”-It still remains an unsolved mystery “Did situation define music, or did music transform the situation?

If you do not agree,question!!!!

Hinduism is not a faith or religion but a way of life.Our practices have their foundation based on scientific spirituality. We can see a mention in the ancient Hindu literature(Eesaavaasya Upanishad) that our idea of spirituality and science are very closely integrated.
Why do we light a lamp? Why do we do Namaste? Why do we chant Aum kara? Why do we draw Rangoli?
All these obvious questions should not be dubbed aside as practices being superstitious or baseless; instead be scientifically reasoned out.

Rangoli - the artistic form of sand painting is drawn to appease Gods and Goddesses. Specially at the time of the festival of Diwali, Rangoli is drawn to conciliate Goddess Lakshmi, who is considered to be the Goddess of Wealth by the Hindus. Those of us who seek scientific rationale for this spiritual practice shall delve a little more to comprehend.

The original and ancient form of painting a Rangoli was by means of pure rice flour. It was not just a reason to abide by Dharma where the insects like ants and the rest living in the soil were fed but also prevented those insects from entering the home. Not just this, but the physical movements that this type of arts demanded helped the ladies to maintain fitness and prevented the growing pot belly! The beautiful pictures hidden behind these Rangolis provided a gate-way to present the talent and creative imaginations of the house ladies who had very limited exposure in those days.

The above reckoning made sense in those days where we had sand entrances to homes; ladies were given very little or no avenues to showcase their talent .But why do we have to paint Rangoli in these cemented days?

In this busy mechanical world when we cannot take time for physical fitness, Rangoli can help a great deal to force us make time to exercise our body; Marking of these artistic patterns would desist thieves from entering homes since Rangoli would ensure the presence of people at homes. This artistic form has attracted a host of Foreigners too. A lot of concentration and practice is necessary to develop this art. Drawing Rangolis helps to improve mental discipline and concentration;
On the lighter side, Rangolis form a fine decorative number for homes.