Well, I wouldn’t mind as long as my views are heard and I am content with placing my point across.
There was this usual irksome statement that I heard yest which pushed me to blog this. "Hey dont cry like a gurl!" WTH does that mean? How do I even counter, there is even a movie carrying this "Boys dont cry" which features a gurl getting converted 'coz she wants to be treated a "boy".
"Look there, this lady in the car has blocked the traffic". "Comeon gurl, give way, do not walk on the road". "No wonder shes in for this post, she used her charms and not her brain."- Why do the index fingers easily point to a gurl at every case, in every site?
If we put on weight, it is coz we are lazy to work out. If the guys do, the blame shift is on the fast food place down the street and their heavily loaded job schedule which doesn’t let them take time off to gym.
And why juggle with numbers, giving 33% ,40% seats/reservations. Btw, what rights do the givers have? We are no minority to take permission from them, to get a concession from them. A lady being a home-maker can well balance work at an outside firm; Girls outdo boys in many competitive examinations, at variety sports, workplace, arts etc.
This being the case y still discriminate?
A tall gurl is often blamed by her parents for not being able to match a guy's height during marriage-hunt. If the guy is tall, the term used is "Handsome".
If a gurl concentrates on her career, she is termed "work-o-holic" ;if its a guy- “he is smart and career oriented”. A gurl wishes to go to the distant states for further studies- people would declare she s escaping marriage with creative stories unfolding. If a guy wishes to continue his studies, people call him studious, intelligent and goal-oriented.
People speak of feminists’ acts, discrimination laws with pride, but nothing seems to change this fractured society.
It would do lot good not to hear statements like “You can’t do it, you are a gurl”! “Why don’t you give time to the family, let him concentrate on his career”! “It is better you relocate, he can’t think of changing his job now”!
Keeping away from these sweeping declarations would help gurls get out of the chilly home climate and think of a warm world outside. Reservation for women is just a distasteful remedy; the need of the hour is to remove the discrimination from the minds than from the roots.
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5 comments:
Awsome dee... way to go!!.. :)
Since you have been talking of stereotype's I will talk about the counter-stereotype's ------> The quintessentially working-Indian woman.
All that she wants in life is a 'caring' husband who will 'look after' her & with whom she can 'settle' down having a family.
Its just that previously women werent provided with these kind of oppurtunities to work, but now they do. At home gossiping with neighbours or at work gossiping with colleagues, their outlook on life & marriage has remained the same.
So all the men you keep referring to are those who cater to these women. They have been brought up to believe that a woman is to be married so that she can be supported & they are looking for a woman who 'wants' to be supported. So as long as there are women who 'want' to be supported there will be men who will discriminate against those who dont want to be supported. So stop targetting the chauvinist-men because the "the need of the hour is to remove the discrimination from the minds of the women themselves".
P.S: I have stuck to only stereotypes & in no way can this be generalized.
@Anup :I buy this statement "the need of the hour is to remove the discrimination from the minds of the women TOO". Its the society which has tamed them. Women have been made self-sacrificing martyrs thro years.
Not many educated/working ladies would prefer a life being supported by somebody. "Financial independence for women" is a topic I would not want to adjoin this thread. It is our cultural conditioning that has made women put their family’s needs above their own.
The point in focus is about treating a gurl/woman the way a guy s treated. We do not want a special chair, nor do we expect to be throne-d at home.
The target is not at the chauvinist-men, but at the society in general.The creepy thing is that many women themselves don’t treat these discriminations as problems coz of imbibing so many dis-empowering values from our family, culture and mores.
This is an age old topic and to be honest, there's nothing new you're adding.
Societies change over time and these are slow changes. Its good to have hopes but remember at the back of your mind, that there's no such thing as an ideal society. You remove these discriminations and others will crop up.
But one thing is clear. Whatever limitations exist in the society, it is still producing great men and women. No society can stop a committed individual. So pushing the blame on the society is a bad idea.
Well Karthik I know its an age old topic to comment on. And I am with u in most of what u said. This is just one in the chain of thoughts tat kept me pondering over the last few days. Than sobbing alone and brooding over it I happened to scribble my thoughts. After all blogs are meant for that!
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